We're not quite sure what the "F" in his name stands for, but we have a hunch it stands for "Funny" as our interview with Paul F. Tompkins will attest to. Other than his ability to kick the nicotine habit, his other notable accomplishments include his roles with HBO's "Mr. Show," Tenacious D (show and film), various Reel Comedy movie spotlights, and a particularly funny bit in the hilarious movie Anchorman.
For information on his upcoming gigs visit his MySpace page at MySpace.com/PaulFTompkins Also, be sure to watch Comedy Central on March 16th to see his half hour special "Comedy Central Presents: Paul F. Tompkins."
Q: We love your commentary on VH1's "Best Week Ever!" Have you ever bumped into a celebrity who told you that they didn't appreciate being "grilled" by you on the show?
PT: No. And I never will, as I spend all of my time in a dank, dark screening room, watching my own Best Week Ever clips over and over again, eating individual Hershey bar squares and storing my urine in milk bottles.
Q: What was your greatest accomplishment in 2006?
PT: I quit smoking. Is that a good answer? I didn't adopt a child or do any sort of charity work. I don't even know if it's an accomplishment if it's the absence of doing something. I'm sorry, human race. I'll get you next time.
Q: It has been said that "Anger is a condition in which the tongue works faster than the mind." What's an example of something you said when you were angry that you wish you could take back?
PT: "I don't want your filthy money!"
Q: Can you describe yourself without adjectives?
PT: Tie and hair.
Q: If money were no object, what one gift would you purchase for yourself?
PT: It's funny that you use the phrase "If money were no object", because I would buy myself SOOOO many objects. My house would be filled with them. Oh, and I'd buy a house!
Q: In Anchorman, we're fairly confident you delivered the best "Cat Show MC" performance of all time. How fun was it being on that set?
PT: It was a lot of fun. I mean a LOT. Adam McKay, the director, is an old friend of mine from Philadelphia, back when we were drinking and dropping out of college together. To see him in command of that set and yet so relaxed, and clearly held in such high regard by everyone around him, was quite touching. Ugh. My sincerity just tasted bad to me.
Q: If a chronic liar tells you he is a "chronic liar" do you believe him?
PT: Is this some kind of there-are-two-doorways type of riddle or some shit? Man. I don't know. Maybe I would believe he was an occasional liar and was lying about the chronic part because he hadn't lied all that day and he was due.
Q: You turned in some hilarious performances on HBO's "Mr. Show". Can you share some of your favorite memories from filming?
PT: Without a doubt, my favorite part of filming was taping the shows in front of a live audience. I was so anxious the whole time I worked for the show, always thinking I was going to get fired, that playing roles on location was fairly nerve-wracking. The live shows were more relaxing for me because all the location stuff is done and now there was nothing left to do but just do the show. Once it starts, everything's gonna be okay because there's no alternative. It has to be. And the excitement of being in front of an audience is unbeatable. I wish the show had actually been broadcast live-- I bet we could have done it.
Q: Other than perhaps world domination, what are your plans for 2007?
PT: World domina-- wait. Hm. To start smoking again?
Q: What's the first thought that comes into your head when we say wombat?
PT: Does it come form the root "womb"? Because maybe they are beautiful, like the miracle of birth. I've never seen one, and I hope I never do. A wombat or a birth? Either.