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Home arrow The Modern Man arrow The Modern Man arrow The Male Viewpoint #2
The Male Viewpoint #2 Print
Written by Simon Thorn   
May 22, 2007 at 01:16 AM

Male Viewpoint

1) Do men ever completely trust their girlfriend's male friends?
From Jill L. in Hollywood, CA

No. We know our own. The "Man Rules," that many of us try to live by, are easily discarded if our penis decides to start giving orders to our cerebral cortex.

Men and women can be friends; it's just a tough pairing for your partner to stomach. I guarantee you that at one point during the friendship, the male (provided he has even an iota of attraction to the gal) will want to cross over to something more serious.

We especially don't trust your really sensitive male friend. He's the one with the cute dimples and disturbingly good abs. We know he makes you those great mix CDs, and we hate him. Sure, he could just be gay, but it seems like he knows you awfully well and he always dresses better than us. Wait a minute, that one is gay. Okay, but the other one, you know the tall one with the light eyes? The one who you've known for so long and who just had his heart broken by that one girl he dated off and on.....We don't trust him at all.

2) What is it about oral sex that men love so much that they would sometimes prefer it to intercourse?
From Jenn K in Oxford, MI

I have some ice cream for you! Well actually, two kinds:

The first one will be beyond delicious and I'll even spoon feed to you! All you have to do is lie back and enjoy it.

The second one will also taste amazingly scrumptious, but you'll have to really physically exert yourself to enjoy it. .....Oh, and you also should make sure I'm enjoying the process of feeding you this treat. .....and it's possible that you may have to even forgo your own pleasure to ensure mine during the process.

Okay, which one do you want? : )

Simple isn't it? Oral sex represents all of the fun of orgasm without the energy depletion of intercourse. We're guaranteed an environment that's a snugger fit than a vagina, and we don't have to focus on giving you any pleasure. On a final note, we can't get your mouth pregnant.

I'm fairly sure I've just set the male culture back 15 years.

3) I know a good percentage of men prefer that a woman has no pubic hair whatsoever. Are there other ways of grooming that are equally as attractive/acceptable?
From Alice S. in Warren, NJ

Why males are attracted to females devoid of vaginal growth? The initial answers don't do much for our reputation.

1) We enjoy it because it's become the standard for the sexiest women from porn / strip clubs.
2) A possible latent desire for underage girls.

Let's ignore these possible attractors and move to what I believe to be the main motivator of this desire; cleanliness. Whether a valid stigma or not, "vaginal freshness" has long been an issue for men. We simply see shaven crotches as cleaner and ergo, more desirable.

4) What do men really think about women with tattoos? When does a woman with ink go from sexy to trashy?
From Elaine G. in Warren, MI

Temperance and location place a big part in this query. Some men equate a "tramp stamp"; "bull's-eye"; or an "Arschgeweih", which in German literally means "ass antlers," as an instant sign that a girl is promiscuous. But alas, neither the number of tattoos, nor the location makes the woman. I've known many females with ink who have been charming and enlightened (and plenty of imbecilic skanks who have been tat-free).

I believe most males would prefer women to keep the body art to a minimum and please, don't ruin a perfectly good breast with a desecrating design. I could also get into how I think girls with lip rings are the real ones to avoid......but that's a whole other story.

5) My boyfriend's birthday is coming up and I am not sure what to get him. Any ideas?
From Kate N. in Riverside, CA

The answer naturally depends on his interests. Since every man is different, this is problematic without knowing your boyfriend. So in order to help, let my give you a scenario in which every man would be pleased. The following dialogue comes from the twisted, yet amusing romantic comedy "Love Stinks." Bridgette Wilson's character is talking to her boyfriend played by French Stewart.

Chelsea: Can I make it up to you?
Seth: What did you have in mind?
Chelsea: Back rub, blow-job, breakfast in bed.

So inexpensive isn't it? It's base, totally devoid of a personal touch, and absolutely perfect. Guys love to be massaged, fed, and blown (not necessarily in that order).

Your boyfriend can thank me later.

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