1) She can't go more than 3 minutes without asking if you want a "private dance."

2) Red Lobster doesn't have as many crabs as she does.

3) She can't go out this weekend because she's "sore from yesterday's pony show."

4) You tried to get to 2nd base with her when, out of nowhere, a bouncer showed up and started wailing on you.

5) She's been stocking up on bags of ice to help ease her "pole burn."

6) The only pairs of shoes in her closet are 9" stiletto heels.

7) She's collected more singles than Ichiro.