1) You say "Show me the Carfax," and he says "Fuck you!"

2) He claims that if you get the car to speed up to 88 MPH, you can travel through time.

3) When you ask for "The Kelly Blue Book price," he says that no one by the name of Kelley Blue works at this dealership.

4) You ask for a test drive, he then drives off in the car, returns 20 minutes later and then informs you that the car works "Just fine."

5) He pleads with you to hurry up and make a decision because he really has to "take a dump."

6) When you inquire about a cute "Hybrid," he hands you a Puggle.

7) He doesn't know much about anti-lock brakes, but he does know a lot about the Loch Ness monster.