1) It's not gay if you pretend to not enjoy it.

2) It's not gay if only one of you wears leather.

3) It's not gay if you don't swallow.

4) It's not gay if the car you're in has a Hemi.

5) It's not gay if you don't tap your feet and hum.

6) It's not gay if you have a really macho safe word.

7) It's not gay if you use WD-40 and Duct tape.